I’ve been thinking long and hard about how to construct our group website.  The problem is, we practice in South Carolina, in the Blue Ridge Foothills.  Everyone in the area is ‘Mountain this,’ or ‘Blue Ridge that,’ or ‘Lakeside something.’  We aren’t a creative lot.  Consequently, coming up with a logo is a little difficult.  Mountains and a lake?  Done.  EKG strip across mountains?  Done.  I just don’t know.

I was thinking about some more specific imagery:  a beer bottle by a wrecked car.  An EKG over a bucket of fried fat-back.  A skull with a spike through it.  It all seems a little morose for the general population.

So, we’re left with our bland but functional name, and a website that will probably feature each of us, looking like doctors (oh the horror!), and smiling wanly for the camera.

At least, that was the future until my friend Luis came up with the idea of ideas.  Luis, aspiring medical student, is one of our unit coordinators (aka ward secretary).  He’s a very bright guy with an expansive knowledge base, great personality and awesome work ethic.  (Dear medical school administrators, I recommend him!)

Luis suggested pasting all of our heads onto the bodies of assorted rock-stars as they appear on album covers.  I thought, ‘now that’s genius!’  He offered to make me look like Jimmy Page, but I had to decline.  I realized that what I really want to be portrayed as Ted Nugent, with a guitar, Indian War Bonnet and loin cloth!  Ted and I agree on most political issues, especially the ones that involve guns.
Of course, we’re a group, so a band would be better.  There will soon be ten docs in our little corporation.  So how many bands had ten people?  KC and the Sunshine band?  That won’t fly.  Glenn Miller’s Orchestra?  Considering the average age of our patients, that might work.  Menudo?  How many have there been?  Hundreds by now?

We could be Jacksons or Osmonds, or some bizarre fusion of the two.  Or, we could just each pick and individual rocker to have our heads pasted onto for the website.  “Dr. Leap plays ‘Stranglehold!’  When he ain’t rocking Detroit, or riding a Bison, he’s in the ER providing you with the best in state-of-the-art emergency care!”  One of my partners would make a great Johann Sebastian Bach.  He’s a little more orderly than I am, you might say.  Another could be Janice Joplin, maybe, or Carol King.  I’ll have to ask her which she prefers, I suppose.

We have one who could be Tom Jones (except nobody wants boxers thrown into the audience), another who might make a passable Brad Paisley and a PA who could easily pass for Earl Scruggs; or the guy playing banjo on ‘Deliverance!’

You have to admit, the idea has merit.  Luis is a genius.

Who would you like to be?  What star would you like to represent you on your website?  It says a lot about you, if you’ll just be honest, for heaven’s sake.  No, Jonas Salk does not count, and neither do Hillary Clinton, Barak Obama, Mitt Romney, Mike Huckabee or John McCain.

I’ll be interested to read your ideas.

Have a fun day!


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