Election Related Illness…

Now that the presidential election is past, national emergency departments are seeing an increase in election-related health problems. While anxiety, depression and homicidal rage are what one might expect, it turns out, according to emergency physician Dr. Chuck McShortridge, the bigger issues seem to stem from people sitting at computers all day long and linking to political posts on Facebook, Twitter, Reddit and assorted other online outlets.
“Just last week we had three patients with massive pulmonary emboli. I asked their spouses about surgery, cancer, fractures, trips overseas, and the common thread was this: ‘No, but he (or she) spent the last six months linking to articles about how Hillary is a crook or Donald is a liar, or something like that.’”
Other physicians have noticed the same. Dr. Maggie McFarris reported another issue: “I keep seeing patients who complain of a constellation of symptoms: blurred vision, sleeplessness, carpal tunnel syndrome and in some cases, acute renal failure. I call it Donald-Clinton Syndrome. They never get off the (expletive deleted) couch. All day long it’s ‘that Hillary is a crook who can’t be trusted’ or ‘he hates women’ and links to dozens of articles a day. They don’t eat, they don’t drink, they don’t exercise, they don’t even have sex.”
One spouse we interviewed in the waiting room of a large ER said, “My wife has lost a lot of weight because she won’t eat! Just the other day I made this great vegetarian dish she loves and all she said was ‘I don’t have time, I just found this incredible piece on Trump at Politico and I have to share it!’ I ate dinner alone. Thank God the election is over say she can finally get the Xanax and IV fluids she needs.”
On a related note, some politically active physicians we met in the course of this article are lobbying to have advocacy counted as CME. Dr. Joseph Mooring, known for his bumper-sticker-laden Subaru, political buttons and frequent presence at online forums, stated: “CME? Who has time for that? I’m trying to save America, and in the process American healthcare! I should totally get credit for the hours I’ve logged trying to save the nation!” American Board of Emergency Medicine representatives said the board might be able to work political advocacy into the new Lifelong education modules.
Practitioners are urged to continue to be diligent in looking for election related illness and injury.

One thought on “Election Related Illness…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *